Femme Witchcraft

Manifestation Thoughts

Recently, a huge way that I believe I receive signs and messages is through tiktok. If I see a handful of tarot reading that are all saying the same message then, to me, that warrants a piece of my attention and could actually be for me.

Latetly, the readings that I’ve been seeing have all been saying; “Your manifestations are coming in quick! You are manifesting the life you want, the partner you want and I’m telling you they are coming to you!” (All of the readings have been about a partner coming into my life that will lead to a long healthy relationship.)

The only problem? I haven’t been actively manifesting anything. So wtf is coming into my life!

Something that I’ve heard a lot of experienced practitioners say on tiktok about manifesting and shadow work, is that shadow work and meditation is designed to bring your manifesting out of your subconscious and into your conscious so that you can get what’s best for you. I always understood what they were saying, but I never really got it.

Until about 5 seconds ago.

This past summer I’ve gone through some stuff that has made me open to and wanting a relationship. However with the pandemic going on, there’s a level of fear of getting the virus which makes me not want to go on dates. Another matter to point out is that while scrolling tinder, if I see someone is not right at where my university is, doesn’t matter how hot they are I won’t swipe right. They have to be close because i don’t have a car and I don’t have the energy to coordinate.

Right now I’m talking to this really hot guy that is exactly my type. When he came on my tinder feed it said he was from my university. So I swiped right on him and we matched. When I moved back onto campus I was excited and scared of meeting up with him. However, I didn’t realize when I’d swiped on him that he was also 60 miles away, which is almost an hour and a half away from campus.

Guess that took care of the fear.

Ever heard someone say that we create our own reality? That the world is a mirror. This is actually an example of this. And I actually was manifesting him, I was simply doing it in my subconscious.

I wanted a relationship with a specific type of guy, so I was manifesting a lover. However that want was being filtered through my subconscious need for survival. So what I got was exactly what I wanted and needed; the perfect guy, but at a distance not easily crossed so that my safety wasn’t in jeopardy.

My ancestors have even been telling me that I need to let go of what I can’t control and trust them. Now I think I understand what they were meaning by that.

I attract to me the relationship that was meant to be. Protected from harm and illness.

Guided Meditation to Meet my Spirit Guides

To get ready for this meditation I gathered a bunch of my crystals that were going to help; clear quartz to help me contact them, lepidolite for help with my intuition, amethyst for clairvoyance, citrine because it helps meditation, red jasper for grounding, onyx arrowhead for protection, and petosky stone for protection against misinformation.

I had already been burning incense sticks for my guides and ancestors so that helped. Not sure if this means anything but the incense stick for my guides was burning much faster than the incense for my ancestors. Maybe they were excited I was finally doing his.

The meditation first had me relax and envision a cloak of protection. After a little bit of that it had me imagine myself at the beginning of a trail, and she liked to picture rolling hills so that’s what I pictured. I walked along the trail and came to a huge cliff on the ocean. She told us to picture our dream home or safe space and I tried to envision a castle but my higher self wasn’t having it and it kept changing to a small cottage off to my right, maybe 100 yards away.

The front of the house was facing me (east). It had a porch wrapped around it and was made of smooth unpolished light wood. To the right (facing the door) was a wooden rocking chair with Manny’s Mexican blanket laying over it. As I wrapped it around me I knew it was there as love. Either love in general, or the love I had for him, or as the love he had for me I’m not sure. I just knew it was there for a sense of love.

The door was this brownish red color and the doorknob was brass. As I walked inside the first thing I noticed was the floors were covered in carpets, just like I want my future home to be. It was rly specific bc as I walked in my gaze was drawn down like a video game. Maybe it was my higher self. There was a small round table to my left and the kitchen was to my right. It had an island counter and there was a row of unique mugs across the wall.

There were two banisters and stairs sectioning it off from the living room (like how grandpas house is). Originally I saw my bed to the left but I told my higher self I didn’t want it there, so we created a back room and moved the bed to the back left corner. There were big picture windows in the center of that room that I opened to invite the fresh air, and along the west facing wall, I created a big alter. Lower to the ground with a prayer pillow sitting on the floor.

Back inside the living room was couches and coffee tables, and a fireplace on the wall that connects to the bedroom, the fire already lit.

At this point the women directed me to go to the door to watch the sunset. I went outside and sat in the rocking chair, pulling Manny’s blanket around me. After the sun went down and it started to get dark I lit a lantern that hung by the door.

A bright light came down from the sky back where I started my walk and it made its way over the hills until it stopped a few feet in front of my house. The light got brighter as it took the form of a snowy owl. I invited it inside and gave it two offerings; a small bowl of “owl food” that was like dog food but then thought it would like a mouse better. It took the mouse and I cleared the dog food. Then as it looked around a little I set out a bowl of water and it drank. We sat together for a little while, I was kinda waiting for the women to tell me what to do next.

She said let any messages become clear in any manner. I asked what it was hear to help me with and of course my ego was trying to fill in the blanks, when suddenly my consciousness was transformed into an owl. I was some kind of brown owl, just a little bit smaller than my guide. We flew out the door and into the night sky.

While I didn’t get a feeling of elation like I was expecting, it was still pretty cool. We flew down the side of the cliff to the ocean and I tried to picture as many things as I could; the sound of seagulls, of the ocean crashing against the cliff, of the wind around my wings.

We went and sat on the porch for a little bit and then we took flight again, this time to catch a mouse. I had to cough right as it was doing its dive so I missed that, but then I circled around and found my own. I met it in front of the front door and we ate it together. At first I was picking it apart and trying to envision what it would taste like but then I remembered owls just swallow their food whole, so then I did that.

At that point the meditation wasn’t over but I knew this guide had nothing else to say, and so it became a glowing orb once more and returned to the sky.

At that was the end. I thanked my crystals for their help and protection and collected the incense ash.

My Crystals!

Crystals are used for a lot of different purposes- cleansing, protection, and giving an extra oomph to spells or meditation. This lists all the crystals I currently have and their metaphysical properties and correspondences.

First I want to start out with the stones I got from my Chakra Stone Set.

Red Jasper: helps with grounding, healing, protection, balances aggressive energy, courage. Chakra, Element, Planet: Root, Fire, Mars

Carnelian: creativity, action, healing, sexual energy, grounding, courage, self confidence, purifies blood and improves circulation. Chakra, Element, Planet: Sacral, Fire, Mars

Citrine: Self-esteem, willpower, success, prosperity, wealth, abundance, joy. Good for manifesting and achieving goals. Chakra, Element, Planet: Solar Plexus, Fire, Jupiter

Aventurine: love, good luck, opportunity, vitality, confidence, prosperity, wealth, emotional calm, healing. Chakra, Element, Planet: Heart, Water, Earth

Lapis Lazuli: Communication, Truth, wisdom, generosity, critical thinking, problem solving, calmness, psychic development Chakra, Element, Planet: Throat, third eye, Water, Jupiter

Lepidolite: intuition, dreams, relaxing, anxiety-reducing, heals pain from trauma, connection to highest good Chakra, Element, Planet: Third Eye, Water, Jupiter, Neptune

Clear Quartz: expanded awareness, psychic abilities, meditation, clearing/cleansing, comm with guides and higher realms, intention enhancement, protection, self healing, Chakra, Element, Planet: All chakras, Storm, All planets

Rose Quartz: love, calming, joy, creativity, empathy, cleansing, relaxation Chakra, Element, Planet: Heart, Water, Venus

Amethyst: travel, psychic abilities, dreams, focus, anxiety relief, wisdom, clarity, Chakra, Element, Planet: Third eye, crown, wind, Jupiter, Saturn, Neptune

Onyx: protection, strength, confidence, clearing, grief and mourning, balancing polarities, focus, growth, Chakra, Element, Planet: root, solar plexus, third eye, earth, Earth, Mars, Saturn

Petosky: opening of third eye, psychic awareness, protection, creativity, enhance emotions, Chakra, Element, Planet: Third Eye, Crown, Water,

Wishing Stone: It is said that if you find a stone with a white band going all the way around it, any wish you make on it will come true. I am not too certain if I do have a wishing stone because it has multiple lines around it not just one.

I have two bags full of different crystals from going to a crystal mine when I was younger. These ones are simply the ones whose identity I am certain of but I have lots more of ones I didn’t include because I don’t know what kind of stone it is.

thecrystalcouncil.com is where I got most of my info once I found it.

Basics of Manifesting

Manifestation, simply put, is the act of creating your will. This can be done in various ways, complicated or simple.

Another way to understand what manifestation is, is to see it as the energetic form of physically working for what you want. If you want a job, and you go out and interview and if you land a job from one of those interviews, you can see that as physically manifesting what you want. You communicated to the universe what your goal was and you went about a means to achieve it.

Magic is the same just minus the physical. You communicate to the universe what it is that you want, and the universe brings it to you. In order for this to work, though, you have to have a clear and strong intent.

What do I mean by this? For example, if you tried to manifest a “happy life,” well then you probably won’t be too happy with the results. You have to be more specific. What do you want that will make you happy? When do you want to get it? How do you want to get it? That kind of stuff.

Some common and simple ways to manifest are reciting affirmation, creating a vision board, making a wish on dandelion fluff, or even praying.

I encourage you to personalize manifestation as much as you can. It’s going to feel much more fluid if you identify how you manifest naturally and build on that. And yes, everyone manifests naturally. Have you ever been thinking about a person and then they call you? Manifesting.

I’ve identified two ways in which I naturally manifest.

The main way in which I prefer to manifest is by daydreaming. I’m pretty sure that I had maladaptive daydreaming disorder at some point when I was really little. I didn’t like my home life and so I would daydream constantly as a means of escape. Well, by being able to picture very clearly what I wanted and how it would look like in my everyday life, I was naturally manifesting.

For example, me and my best friend Paige were planning on living together in the dorms this coming year but sadly we couldn’t for COVID reasons. I didn’t like the idea of having a different roommate, so I was thinking about applying for the single dorm room, and once I learned the single room was right next to Paige’s room I couldn’t get it out of my head.

I learned that someone else already had the room, but I still couldn’t stop thinking about it. I would picture how I would arrange the furniture and how the energy of the room would feel. I would picture going in and out of it throughout the day. A little later I got an email saying the person had given up the room and they had moved me in there automatically since I’d made the request!

I’ve also personalized affirmations.

I know affirmations are very powerful, but I’ve never been able to connect will just reciting sentences. By the way, if you don’t know, affirmations are when you affirm what you want. So some examples would be “I am abundant,” “I will get (x) job,” etc.

I realized I could connect to affirmations much better through daydreaming. So instead of reciting to myself “I am powerful,” I would create a scenario where someone tried to shame me and I’d respond with “I’ve walked through fires and dealt with the burns. Don’t think your opinion is important to me.”

So instead of just saying I was (x), I would create a scene where I felt (x). Hits different.

Hope this helped!

Connecting with My Dragon

I just got done with a 20 minute long meditation where I connected with my Dragon. The way she was talking about it made it sound like it was another form of spirit guides or angels. They have wisdom to share with us to help us on our journey

She led me to a cave opening. The walls were damp and the sides were rocky. It was maybe 20ft wide by 15ft tall. As I walked along the path the cave got darker and darker until I couldn’t see anything. I came to a large opening with the cave ceiling opening up far above my head. Although the cave ceiling didn’t open up to the outside, it was lighter in this room and in the middle was a plan rock chair. I sat down and focused on my breath.

At first I thought I was perceiving my dragon as red, but as I focused on my own astral body and forming it into a dragon I realized I was visualizing myself. My own dragon form was that of a Chinese looking dragon with a serpentine body, 4 legs and 2 wings. I was a vibrant red and orange color with hints of white. My body was made of scales but my wings were made of feathers. They looked to be lighter than the rest of my body but I’m not sure if they were white or not.

I focused on my specific vibration located in my heart chakra, and sent out waves with my intention of calling my dragon to me. At the top right corner of the cave wall I was facing in my chair, I became aware of a huge black opening. I knew it led to the dragon realm, and this is where my dragon would emerge from. I became aware of the air moving, like a vibration going through it. My dragon flew through the opening and landed in front of me. The first thing I perceived was its color: black. But not a dull and lifeless black. The scales of its underbelly reflected different colors of deep emerald, violets, blue and everything else. It’s back was more of a smoky black but still held the same reflective quality. It appeared as a Chinese dragon as well, with 4 legs and two wings. It’s wings matched its body and looked more like bat wings than bird.

When I sent out another wave from my heart chakra, this time asking for its name, the first thing that came to me was Ashon/ Ashun. I’m not sure if that’s the dragon’s actual name or it’s my ego coming up with that name, but either way the dragon was still when I called it Ashon. So we’ll go with that right now until I can heighten my senses enough to learn its actual name.

I moved my own dragon body and pressed my forehead against Ashon’s as a greeting, and we rubbed our faces against each other, and under each others chins as a way to show affection.

While I had my own wings, this was my first time perceiving them and I wasn’t sure I wanted to use them just yet so I climbed onto Ashon’s back and we flew out of the tunnel and into the dragon realm. The sky was beautiful and we were far above the clouds. The sun was turning them oranges and pinks and yellows. I saw a few other dragon’s in the sky although I’m not sure I was perceiving them correctly. Ashon simply wanted to fly with me, and I stretched my own wings to feel the air move over them.

After a little bit he brought me back to the cave, and we nuzzled again to say goodbye.

This was a really cool experience for me and now I’m thinking of possibly working with dragons when I get to that point in my craft.

Visited by a Demon??

So last night I had this really weird dream. I couldn’t remember the beginning of the dream but I do know there was a beginning. I remember being in a building with a huge vaulted ceiling, and I was slowly walking toward a monster. I was being offered as its wife. I couldn’t see it at first because it was standing behind a column, but as I walked around it, it came into view.

It looked like it came out of Dark Souls. Its body was entirely black. Its arms touched the floor even though it wasn’t hunched over. I (understandably) started screaming bloody murder. It had this horribly creepy smile and it started laughing.

Thats when I woke up. Thinking back on the dream, it wasn’t really scary but after I was awake in bed trying to go back to sleep, even thinking about it would make me scared.

Have you ever had an adrenaline rush? where your entire body feels alive and jittery? What happened next was slightly like that, minus the adrenaline. This wave of intense energy washed over my body. I remember that there were more specific things I was feeling from this energy rush but I can’t remember.

It made me feel jittery because the energy was just that powerful, and through my past meditations I knew the energy wasn’t my own. It was coming from some outside source.

So there is an entity in my room, just chilling. I guessed it was a demon because I’d been telling my family that I was planning on working with demons when my craft was at that point.

Now I know you’re probably thinking this went The Conjuring style, or I was at least shitting my pant. Nope. It was powerful, but I wasn’t scared of it. Not even in the slightest, which surprised even me.

Here’s how I see demons. They are not inherently evil. Yes you have to be careful not to let any demon walk all over you and do whatever they want cause that can be very harmful to you, but they are not evil. They are powerful forces of chaos.

I had been putting out into the world that I desperately wanted to work with demons but I thought I was just setting a goal, I didn’t realize I was lighting up like a beacon, calling to demons to come check me out for a possible partnership, but I was.

In the morning I confirmed that a demon had been here with my pendulum and I asked my spirit guides what they thought of it via tarot. I got the Queen of… I wanna say wands? which I interpreted it as saying the demon was feminine. The Hierophant reversed, which was saying I wasn’t ready for a teacher (and I totally agree), and the Sun, which I saw as saying they weren’t trying to hurt me.

I am honestly so happy that happened.

I don’t feel like a Witch

There is a video on youtube I came across a few weeks ago. It talks about the different stages of a spiritual awakening. The first stage is The Wake Up. It’s when you start questioning the world around you, when you start asking the big questions: Is this all there is? Is this even anything?

If memory serves, I never went through this stage. At least not in the way that I could name a specific time. I guess it happened through a series of years. I was a huge daydreamer, and the feeling of knowing there was more was always at the back of my mind.

The second stage is the Euphoric stage. This is when you feel the great connectedness of the world, you feel happy and safe. Like a teenager marveling at newfound freedom.

(As a disclaimer, people can go through these stages in different order)

I never went through this stage either. I always understood how everything was connected. How the actions of someone who’ve never met could influence your life. But I never felt it. Never had this grande feeling of wonder for the world around me.

This is probably my biggest hurdle with being a Witch. I don’t feel anything. Lately I’ve started saying with all seriousness that I’m dead inside. Not in the depressed way, but just in the way that I don’t feel connected to anything.

When I think about practicing magic, I think of it as something separate from myself. Performing a ritual, or casting a spell. I think of magicking living inside my single dorm room that I’ll move into in the fall. In my head, it’s always separate from myself and my living conditions.

I know for a fact I’ve read about and listened to people saying that magicking is alla round you and inside you- energy is literally what atoms are made up of- but I could never really apply it to myself in a way that I truly believed.

Someone finally got through to me though. I just started reading this amazing book, “Becoming Dangerous” edited by Katie West and Jasmine Elliott. It’s a collection of essays written by various people about their own rituals that help them deal with things like racism, sexism, rape, PTSD, etc.

The second essay is about trash-magic. How a cripple finds everything she needs for her magic in the trash. How she finds magic in the disposable.

I still don’t feel connected but I can see magic in the house, in my day to day routine. And for now, that’s enough.

Audition Tutorials

https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/786305239&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=false&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true”></iframe>

https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/786305254&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=false&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true”></iframe>

https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/786305257&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=false&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true”></iframe>

Finished Logo!

https://flyclipart.com/scales-balance-weight-justice-scale-icon-scales-of-justice-png-271831

I finished my logo! Very simple but I think it communicates what I want it to communicate.For my logo for this website I wanted it to communicate fairness, truth, politics, and an open conversation. Since the name of this blog is political thoughts, it seemed very fitting to include a thought cloud in the logo. Thinking about what I wanted to put inside, Lady Liberty’s scales appealed to me because they automatically communicate truth and fairness, which was exactly what I wanted.

However, just having those two elements with nothing else, that logo can be for any number of businesses or anything, so I added some color. I think the simple way of including the red and blue for the two primary political parties communicates that this is specifically about politics.

I had to trace the scales from a picture I found on the internet, on FlyClipart. The URL to the site is under the picture.

Logo Draft

I like this as my logo for this website because the thought cloud communicates that its an open conversation, and Lady Liberties scale communicates that there’s no starting bias. For the final I’ll be adding some color to make it clear that it’s about politics. I was thinking blue and red for the two major parties in the US.